


We Are One

by Meridia-Diavolos Concubine (ralex002), ralex002



Category: Shall We Date?: Obey Me!
Genre: Gore, Other, Vomiting, What Have I Done
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-22
Updated: 2020-08-22
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:48:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,439
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26052964
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ralex002/pseuds/Meridia-Diavolos%20Concubine, https://archiveofourown.org/users/ralex002/pseuds/ralex002
Summary: Is everything bubblegum and ice-cream between Lucifer and Satan now? Find out the answer when a game of Truth or Dare? goes very, very wrong.
Relationships: Lucifer/Satan (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!), Mammon (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!)/Original Female Character(s)
Kudos: 13





	We Are One

It's after midnight, and sleep still eludes me. I've never had insomnia before the horrific incident at the House of Lamentation. These thoughts must be put to paper or else they will haunt my sleep. It's been a month since the horror occurred. But I get ahead of myself. My name is Meridia Thorn, a human exchange student brought to the Devildom from another otome game three months ago. Why I came here, I fail to know for certain. I just woke up here one day, and a man claiming to be the heir to the throne of hell revealed that I'm supposed to spend a year here as an exchange student. The night before, I was living as a magician's apprentice in Vesuvis. So here I am. I commenced my studies and made friends with these emotionally stunted demons. That's an item that I can scratch off my bucket list.

Now, the story that I'm about to unfold within these pages will sound like the ramblings of a severely psychotic individual. You may think me illl and in need of treatment. But let me be perfectly clear before I give my full statement: I am a sober woman. I rarely drink, and except for the occasional psychotropic potion ingredient, I don't consume drugs. I have not done Meth, not even once… 

I don't have a family history of schizophrenia or psychotic episodes. I hope this disclaimer is enough for you to keep an open mind about the events I'm about to retell from that night last month.

I just need to tell my story and hope that someone believes me. I need to escape this nightmare before the year is over. For the love of Satan, where do I begin? I need a moment to organize my thoughts, because they still feel like a dream to me. These memories scitter around my room in the form of shadows in the corners of my vision. How do these stories usually begin? It was a dark and stormy night? Once upon a dreary evening? I hate to disappoint any voyeurs to my misery, but the day was quite ordinary in the Devildom. It all happened after we escaped from Levi's dating simulator game. 

I was relieved to be able to relax without Satan and Lucifer creating insufferable noise with their constant fighting. God, their voices irritated me so much. For once, my shoulders weren’t tense all the way up to my ears. We were even having drinks in the living room while playing a game of truth or dare. We laughed. We cried. We even took shits together. It was fucking magical. 

I dared Beel to eat Mammon’s arm, and he fucking consumed it. We all had a laugh together as blood spurted from the shredded hole where Mammon's limb was previously attached. Mammon prettily convulsed on the floor in a state of glee. He laughed so beautiso I grew concerned for his safety until he started to laugh a bit. I smiled as I placed my hand on his shoulder. I gazed into his distant blue eyes and wondered what he was thinking in that moment. 

Those tender seconds with Mammon were ruined when Lucifer shouted.

I shot my head around startled at his outburst. I thought they were getting along now. I was surprised when I saw him staring in disgust at Asmo who giggled madly.

“Ohh, you have to, Lucifer!” the lusty demon breathed. “You must kiss Satan! I dared you, so you must!”

Everyone waited with bated breath as the tension between Satan and Lucifer grew. When the volatility in the room became unbearable, I spoke up.

“Why don’t we just pass them for this turn?” I offered as a solution. “Or maybe just give them an easier dare?”

Asmo turned to me with a grin that stretched from ear-to-ear and looked like it had come from Hell. He wagged his index finger in my direction.

“Oh, no no no,” he practically sang. “That can’t happen, because I cursed this game of truth or dare. Something bad will happen to whomever refuses their dare.”

Beel coughed on the chicken he choked on. Belphie woke up, because the tension in the room was palpable at this point. Lucifer’s eyes bulged out of his head so much, they fell out. He caught them in his palms and popped them back into his face while mumbling something about this being the hundredth time they fell out. Satan’s eyebrow twitched with barely contained rage as he slammed his book on the floor, stood up, and stormed out of the living room.

Lucifer, on the other hand, went berserk. "That little brat thinks he can just throw a hiss fit anytime something doesn't go his way?!" 

Black-clad fists balled at his sides as he screamed loud enough to break the sound barrier. The house shook, Mammon fell over unconscious, and everyone took cover. The screaming went on like that for five minutes. At some point, silence took over, but I soon realized that my ears were just ringing from Lucifer’s screams. I felt a warm liquid trickle out, and Beel wasn’t far away. He crawled over, his tongue wriggling like a red snake lapping up the life fluid leaking from my ears.  
Meanwhile, Lucifer continued to rage. It was atomic. Literally. I could see the radioactive waves of wind billowing from his body. His skin glowed sickly radioactive green. 

'How is Lucifer able to produce radiation at this power level?' I wondered. I had this ongoing inner dialogue with myself, since I had some trouble hearing. 'What kind of ability is this? Do all demons create such destructive energy when provoked? The real question is how to stop this madness if I want any chance at recovering my hearing. What is the source of his power?

Gritting my teeth as I struggled past the pain, I scanned Lucifer’s body for the center of the radiation. I considered his cock, but I ruled that out when the energy waves didn't end there. That's when the idea occurred to me. The diamond on his head! I traced the lines of energy to his forehead, and they did indeed lead there. I gasped. 

"If we can just remove that diamond from his head, he will be cut off from his source of power," I murmured. "How do we do it? His power level is too high for me to go in alone."

I needed help from the others, but when I looked around all I could see were charred demon-shaped remains where Belphie and Asmo previously sat. looked to Beel and Mammon, the only brothers standing by my side in this dangerous time. Well, one stood while the other was passed out.

"Listen up, Beel! I need you to get behind Lucifer," I commanded in my most urgent voice, kind of like an anime person in a tense situation. "Grab him from behind with your arms locked under his armpits. Keep him as steady as possible while I prepare my special beam cannon attack-"

"I can hear you, you know" Lucifer snapped.

I gasped. Of course, he could hear me! He has preternatural senses!

"I mean, you're just a few feet away from me, so…," he said.

Oh. 

“The hell are you doing now?!” Satan burst through the door yelling.

The Avatar of Pride turned slowly to Satan, seething through his teeth. His chest rose and fell. My eyes raked over his rising and falling chest until they met his crotch, because why not? I was kind of deaf, but certainly not blind. The fallen angel had a raging hard on. While Beel’s tongue lapped my ear blood, I stared at that potato in Lucifer’s pants. I wanted to butter it and pop it in my oven.  
Satan probably noticed, as well, because his eyes were also focused on his brother’s hard-on. He stifled a laugh with his hand.

“Dude, is that a rage-on?” he laughed through his hand covering his mouth.

Lucifer smiled at the blonde one while his hand waved over his crotch.

“Why, yes,” he answered. “Yes, it is. But don't mistake this for rage, dear brother, for I am not you. My organ isn’t full of anger, but love. Love for you.”

This time, holding his arms out, Lucifer began walking toward Satan whose face twisted in fear. The Avatar of Wrath backed away as Lucifer backed him against a wall.

“Brother, why are you so afraid of me?” Lucifer asked, his voice eerie. “Why have you always resented me? I thought we were past this hurtle of our lives. Are we not only full of love for each other. In fact—”

He emphasized his words as he backed Satan into the wall, his arms placed on either side of his younger brother.

“I want to show you how much I love you. How much I … need you,” he closed in, engulfing Satan in his arms.

“Nyoooooo!” Satan screamed as he disappeared inside Lucifer’s cloak.

Beel was spitting some of my blood into Mammon’s wound to restore some of his life juice that continued to flow from his body. Can demons die from blood loss? That would be pretty stupid if they could.

I continued to watch the scene unfold. This next part is what will haunt me for the rest of my days. I should have trusted my instincts to flee. Yet my morbid curiosity won out. Where did Satan go? Was this a trick for my entertainment? The boys often put on elaborate shows of magic for my sake, but this had a more sinister feeling than their usual antics, and it magnified the radiation-induced nausea in my belly.

Lucifer slowly rotated, holding his arms wide so that his loosened cloak slipped off his shoulders to land on the floor with a soft thud. The things I noticed unfolded in slow motion, or so that's how a traumatized brain remembers such events. First I observed that Lucifer's shirt was missing, which is very unlike him to flaunt his nudity. More was revealed to me as he closed in, one black-clad leg planted in front of the other so predatorily graceful. His arms remained open in a mockery of a magnanimous gesture. I searched for what could have been changed about him. The answer reared its head in as my eyes grazed the marble flesh of his torso. 

I did a double take when I saw an unusual protrusion slowly pop out of his left side. First, the malformed head pressed out of his flesh like clay. Pale green eyes bulged out, and the irises pointed in opposite directions from each other. Yellow tufts of hair sprouted from the top of the bumpy flesh mass. I hesitate to call it a proper head, for it was more like a poorly made Play-Doh doll that your parents pretend to be impressed with. The pasty being stared at me, and an unsettling groan emitted from it as fleshy pink lips formed on its face. 

"Mmmeeerr," the flesh mass spoke. 

My eyes widened in horrified recognition that it was trying to speak my name. 

"What is that?" I managed to ask Lucifer. "Tell me that isn't-" 

"Satan?" Lucifeet finished my sentence. "Of course it is. Who else would it be?"  
Satan struggled with my name again. "Meeriii!" 

"How could you do something so cursed?" I asked.

Lucifer put his hand over his chest in a feigned attempt to appear offended at my choice of words.

"Cursed? If anything, this is blursed!" He dramatically stroked Satan's almost bald head. "This is how we were meant to be all along, Meridia. We are one again, but only better than the last time."

I frantically shook my head as my mouth ran dry. 

"Oh, yes!" He exclaimed as his pelvis humped the air. "Now we can both experience you as we were meant to!"

Lucifer tore off his black pants, tossed them haphazardly so they landed on Mammon's motionless body. Two clocks of very different sizes flopped sickeningly in the air. I was most surprised when he lunged at me. I just about died of fright! I clumsily dodged him and darted for the door. As I hauled ass from the living room, I could hear Lucifer and Satan's struggled cries as they slipped around in my vomit. I couldn't afford to look back as I ran straight to my room and locked the door. 

That brings us full circle to where I am now. Locked in my room writing this wretched account by candle light, I startle at the slightest shadow in the corner of my eye. I've been dreading my impending demise for a month.. Why hasn't Lucifer found me yet? Surely he could break down my door whenever he wanted to! The anticipation is eating away at the lining of my stomach. 

The next events happened so quickly. The house shook as a rumbling came from the sky, and the roof was lifted cleanly off the building. Shooting up from my chair, I freeze as I look upwards to see Levi operating a helicopter with Diavolo and Barbatos holding a stretcher. 

Diavolo shouted down to me. "Meridia! We have contained Lucifer and Satan!"

I gasped. "Levi? Did he-?"

Barbados waved his hand to interrupt me. "We will discuss the details later." He tossed a rope ladder down to me. "Please climb on. We need to load Mammon onto the stretcher. He is in critical condition. We should be able to remove his arm from Beel's stomach and reattach it." 

Not even bothering to ask him about that, I just hauled my ass up the ladder. The ladder jerks as the helicopter takes off, and I'm not even halfway up.

"Let me get up there first!" I call up to Levi.

"No can do! Gotta get this back to the AkuCopter rental shop in five minutes!" Levi called back down. "I rented it for an hour, and that hour is almost up!"

Wait, what? Is he prioritizing returning the aircraft over my safety? I just can't with these guys anymore. My life has been endangered more times than anyone should be comfortable with at the hands of emotionally constipated demon boys. 

"You know what?" I began, as my hands loosened from the ladder. "I'm outta here."

With those last words, I let go of the ladder and allow myself to drop into oblivion. Only, it wasn't oblivion, but a lake where I smacked straight into the water. The splash was deafening, but I didn't care anymore. 

Fuck the Devildom. I'm swimming to Skyrim.


End file.
